“You get mad, you get strong, wipe your hands, shake it off, then you stand.”
-Rascal Flatts
Strength comes eventually. Not our own, but it’s strength nonetheless.
A moment I stood:
It was midnight. I had come to swing my thoughts away, rhythmically, on the swing-set. Something about the flying motion soothed the pain, a feeling akin to the sound of ocean waves. Tonight, however my mind would not rest, and my worrysome thoughts tired me. So I stood. I wandered around the small park, a dark green the the moonlight. The pale concrete of the basketball court caught my eye and I moved toward it. Then suddenly, Backstreet Boys blaring into my ears only, I began to dance.
My steps were choppy, at first, awkward steps. I tripped over my tentative feet and looked around furtively; only the stars had seen me and I imagine stars are forgiving. I suppose the basketball hoop saw me as well, but it can’t dance either.
I scanned my world again, searching for the scornful eyes I had become accustomed to. Again, I stared at the stars, glared at them. I was challenging the heavens. They must have chuckled a bit, for it had taken me so long to realize: The stars would not judge me, and man could not. His opinion was inconsequential.
It was then that I stopped trying to move my clumsy feet; I let them move me instead. The stars led me in a beautiful growth dance. My hips began to sway, not excessive, but confident. My beat was the rhythm of the universe. I was free. I was fluid movement, I knew then, that for a moment I was strong, alive, and, like a goose taking off from the lake, a strange and beautiful sight, completely unexpected.
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3 comments:
I like the fresh, honest, immediacy of the piece. The flight of the goose image encapsulates the experience well. Why are you relating this particular memory? Was it a turning point for you? Keep exploring possibilities as you chose which memory to focus on.
I love your descriptions and personification of the stars and the basketball hoop--I can really imagine them being there watching you dance. The message of this memory is great. You describe the process of becoming free of the fear of judgment beautifully by using this great personal memory and bringing the "growth dance" to life. Maybe you could further develop the idea that the strength is not your own.
I am stunned by your wisdom and insight. Stop trying to move my clumsy feet and let them move me instead. Profound.
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